Writing Boots

On communication, professional and otherwise.

PR News invites me to take a moment to view and immerse myself

10.09.2009 by David Murray // 5 Comments

The silent conversation I had with an e-mail promotion I got from PR News:

Dear Friend,

Friend? What is this, a church bulletin?

I'd like to invite you to take a moment to view your complimentary special issue of PR News. 


You'd like to invite me to take a moment to view? Well, do it then!

I encourage you to immerse yourself in this special issue and take away all that PR News offers. 



Wait, I thought I was just s'posed to take a moment to view. Now I have to immerse myself in this, like it's some kind of professional development bubble bath?

Our goal at PR News is to provide information and knowledge that will help you handle any crisis or execute a communications program with the best tools and insights at hand.

Your "goal" is to teach me everything I know to handle any crisis or execute a brilliant communications program? And you're going to do this with a newsletter? Frankly, I'm skeptical.

PR News gives you strategic ideas, guidance and tactical examples to guide you as you execute your business plan and prepare for new campaigns.

Gee, I'm about to execute my business plan and prepare for my new campaign. I sure wish I had a few strategic ideas, some guidance and a handful of tactical examples. Quick, where's that eight-page newsletter!

And we touch on all the key areas of PR and communications that affect your business including:

media relations

crisis management

employee communications

CSR

measurement

internal communications

media training

brand marketing

risk management

integrated marketing communications

investor relations

When I read this list of communication categories, I feel like you're peering into my soul!

At this time, we are offering a special subscription rate. Subscribe now and you can get PR News for only $597, $200 off the regular rate. …

Read this blog for free, $999 off the regular rate.



On behalf of the entire team at PR News, thank you for your time. Enjoy your issue, and don’t forget to take advantage of this special opportunity to subscribe.

Why are you offering a special rate "at this time"? Why are you offering it to me? You've given me a free issue and offered me a special rate, so why are you and your "entire team" thanking me? And finally, I'm right in the middle of the letter; at this point, just how senile would I have to be to "forget" to subscribe?

Sincerely, 

Courtney Barnes 
Editor, PR News 
110 Williams St, 11th Floor 
New York, NY 10038

I believe your name is Courtney Barnes, and that you are editor of PR News, and that you work where you say you work. But that's the only sincerity I can detect in this whole letter.



P.S. This is a limited-time special offer. Don't wait, subscribe right now.

Subscribe to what, again?

Categories // Uncategorized Tags // copy writing, direct mail, newsletter, PR News

Comments

  1. Seth Godin says

    October 9, 2009 at 9:59 am

    Sometimes I laugh so hard at your posts I drop something on my foot.
    Ouch.
    This was perfect.

    Reply
  2. David Murray says

    October 9, 2009 at 10:42 am

    The Writing Boots are steel-toed, Seth.
    (Thanks.)

    Reply
  3. Steve C. says

    October 9, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    Brilliant, David. Just brilliant.
    Why oh would you post that stupid Obama post on TOP of this one, so that fewer people will see this?
    Steve C.

    Reply
  4. Steve C. says

    October 9, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    Brilliant, David. Just brilliant.
    Why oh would you post that stupid Obama post on TOP of this one, so that fewer people will see this?
    Steve C.

    Reply
  5. Dan Danbom says

    October 12, 2009 at 1:59 pm

    The further away I get from PR, the less I miss it. Not that I can avoid it altogether. I think the phrase, “This call may be monitored for quality” came out of a PR person. The last time some caller said that to me, I said, “Well, I’ve have four beers in the last two hours, and I can’t guarantee my call quality.” That shut ’em up.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Now Available

An Effort to Understand

Order Now

SIGN UP TO RECEIVE BLOG UPDATES

About

David Murray writes on communication issues.
Read More

 

Categories

  • Baby Boots
  • Communication Philosophy
  • Efforts to Understand
  • Happy Men, and Other Eccentrics
  • Human Politicians
  • Mister Boring
  • Murray Cycle Diaries
  • Old Boots
  • Rambling, At Home and Abroad
  • Sports Stories
  • The Quotable Murr
  • Typewriter Truths
  • Uncategorized
  • Weird Scenes Inside the Archives

Archives

Copyright © 2023 · Log in

  • Preorder An Effort to Understand
  • Sign Up for Blog Updates
  • About David Murray