Writing Boots

On communication, professional and otherwise.

Monday Morning Memo to Self: Is the flesh sunken, dried out or oily?

01.25.2021 by David Murray // Leave a Comment

An alarming spate of carjackings in Chicago—many of them around my neighborhood—has even the regular muggers on edge. The Chicago PD put out a checklist of ways we ought to try to identify the crumb-bums what swiped our hoop-de.

I think the coppers plagiarized a list I used to keep on the bat’ room mirror, to assess the situation after a big night on Division Street:

  • Forehead—note forehead height, and whether the skin is smooth, creased or wrinkled
  • Eyes—note the color, shape (round, slanted), whether clear or bloodshot, and the heaviness of eyelashes and eyebrows
  • Nose—overall shape (long, wide, flat, etc.) and nostrils (wide, narrow, flared) are important
  • Cheeks—is the flesh sunken, filled out, dried or oily? are there wrinkles around nose or mouth? are cheek bones high or low, wide or narrow?
  • Ears—note size and prominence (protruding or flat against head)
  • Mouth—are lips thin, medium, full? do corners turn up, turn down, or level?
  • Chin—what is the shape (round, oval, pointed, square)? double chin, dimpled, cleft?
  • Neck—note protruding Adam’s apple or hanging jowls
  • Complexion—note pores, pockmarks, acne, razor rash, bumps
  • Facial hair—clean shaven? unshaven? beard, mustache, goatee, sideburns?
  • Tattoos—shape and style; on what part of the body

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