In college, I had a thing for a girl named Elizabeth Hamm. But I couldn't get her to shorten that three-syllable monster. So I went out with a lower-maintenance dame by the name of Beth Held. (That her name was a complete sentence was a pure bonus; that her English major boyfriend appreciated it was her compensation.)
Yes, you can call me Dave.
I work with a Benjamine. I call her "Chief."
Are you really going to make me do the full Jonathan? Time was, people had whole afternoons to work their way from the beginning to the end of a name like Ebenezer. But now, that's about half a tweet. Ben, nice to meet you.
My pal Paul and his wife Barb named their sons Joe and Lou. You wouldn't believe how much this family gets done.
Ted, I'll recognize your Theodore-y glory on first reference, but that's it.
I'm a busy man, Bub.