I'm having my motorcycle mechanic install special exhaust pipes on my motorcycle that will make it louder—for safety reasons, of course.
When Scout got wind of this project, she objected strongly.
"That's rude," she said.
"Telling your mechanic to make your motorcycle louder. His job is to make motorcycles better, not louder."
"And making it louder is making it worse?
"Yes, and you shouldn't ask him to make it worse."
So far, she hadn't said anything wrong.
I thought a minute.
"What if I tell the mechanic to 'enhance the engine's volume'?"
"That's better," Scout instantly agreed, and happily dropped the subject.
“et tu, Murray?!” I guess that officially makes you a big ole communications sell-out!
Just remember this the next time you tee off on some double-speak spewing CEO in a speech using these. Cause I and probably most of your loyal readers will CERTAINLY remember.
David Murray says
My objections to doublespeak are as much on tactical grounds as ethical ones.
If the stupid stuff actually worked–if employees really did start thinking of problems as exciting “challenges”–I might not be the LinguistiCurmudgeon®.
tj denver says
Ah, was happy to see that you ride a moto. But louder pipes in an effort to enhance your safety? How effective do you truely think it is? If you’re right, I should have died decades ago while riding my bike.
Despite our disagreement, a well-written blog will always bring me back.
motorcycle mechanic says
If you are thinking of becoming a mechanic, then it is hard. You have to get all the equipment and trying to build up a customer base is difficult.