I'm creating a list that I'm going to add to regularly of: Maladies, major and minor, suffered in my 40th year.
Because I think it might be an interesting record to have.
As of start of 40th year, 5/1
Almost two years removed from my last cigarette and working out regularly, I'm probably the healthiest I've ever been. Only problems: Chronic pain in right ankle for years, have never had checked out because convinced only surgery can solve. Wisdom teeth that should have come out years ago—like, 20 years ago. Occasional pain in right elbow, occasional pain in right wrist, either from work or golf or … other repetitive activities. And right hip, which, if I stride too far, gives me a twinge.
5/6 Aching in right side of neck when turn my head to the right or push on area. Best-case, I'm fighting off a bug and my gland is letting me know. Worst-case, cancer of the neck. (Resolution: Went away in several days, with whatever cowardly illness I fought off.)
5/18 Right wrist is hurting a lot now, on outside of wrist, where even my skin hurts in a certain spot. My wife, who is suffering from plantar fascism or some such, gleefully squeals, "You've got the carpal tunnel!"
6/3 Right wrist still bugs me, skin is still sensitive. To what do we owe this gift? Less time on the computer? Perhaps.
6/5 Pain around my left collarbone after an early-morning round of golf. (A round during which I noticed that the twinge I had complained of in my hip is gone.)
6/10 Noticed a bump near my right heel last night while reading. When I tried to stratch it off, it began to bleed and didn't stop bleeding for an hour. Now I am afraid of it and haven't looked at it since. (Resolution: healed.)
6/29 Nearly broke foot by running over it with kickstand at gas station on first leg of motorcycle journey. Was hoping for purple bruise. It never came. Pain went away.
8/31 Pain in right shoulder, probably strained during slightly drunken, thoroughly macho shirtless mowing incident in sloped front yard of Uncle Randall's house, in Des Moines. (Please note, two and a half months since my last post. Why? Too busy to notice aches and pains. Motorcycle trip two-thirds cured my carpal-tunnel wrist.)